Humph! I thought. After 21 years of parenting, I suppose I'll never have this mom-thing figured out.
But, as I was tenderly bleaching my son's socks yesterday, it finally came to me. And you know what, my highly respected mom-diva friend, washing my kid's laundry actually makes me an even more better parent-and wife!
(And by "more-better," I mean, better than "less-gooder.")
- I'm creating memories. I've never been the mommy-mom/soccer-mom type. Somewhere I failed to give my kids the illusion that my world revolves around them and only them. But doing laundry is a mom-thing. It reminds my little darlings that I am the mama and it's my hope they'll fondly remember how I did mom-ish stuff when they're older.
- Washing ALL the laundry generates income. I pull at least a dollar and change every week picking my family's pockets.
- I'm more in tune with my kid's personal lives. Are they changing their underwear everyday, are they using TP properly, do they need new underwear? How else is a parent to know these things?
- Doing all the laundry makes our family more charitable. I know what clothes to donate when my kid's clean garments show up repeatedly wadded in the hamper.
- I am the fashion police. I can intercept beloved contraband clothing (too small, too tight, too holy, too inappropriate) and make it disappear without a protest. *poof*
- Being master-washer makes me a hero. I cannot count how many house fires I have prevented by removing the quilts my kids leave in the lint traps.
- I save money and preserve life. I don't ever have to worry if their sweaters will be shrunk, their darks will get bleached or their whites will turn colors. I find the ink pens before they make it into the dryer. I make clothes last longer with stain removing chemicals.
- I help the environment by saving energy not using other appliances. For instance, the iron. Who knows how many 3rd degree burns and trips to the ER I have circumvented by not using an iron, besides all the time we don't waste using one. Our clothes go straight from the dryer to a hanger. If something gets missed, there's nothing in our wardrobe that can't be unwrinkled with a damp towel and a quick fluff in the dryer!
- Washing clothes is love personified. It says, I care how you
make melook. Pulling apart their crusty socks and turning their inside-out clothes back to outside-out says, I will go out of my way for you. Hanging their clothes up says, I matter and you need me.
- I'm like an insurance policy. I know where everything is. Doing my kid's laundry fosters my children's co-dependence on me and sets the bar high for their future wives. They will thank me when they're older.